but do they taste the same?
Today I went to the health food store on campus to get a beverage and I saw a sign by the cashiers that said “Pretty Grapefruit, 3 for $1″. I thought to myself, “that is a weird way to refer to grapefruit” and then remembered that there is a fruit called uglyfruit and maybe its like that. Then I read the sign below the one I just read that said “Ugly grapefruit, 6 for $1″.
January 11th, 2005 at 12:13 am
These are ugly grapefruit. They are horrible little rotten excuses for fruit. They aren’t even fruit at all. If rain is the weepage of the angels in heaven, then ugly grapefruit are the lopped-off wrinkled, decaying, shriveled-up testicles of Gabriel himself. Actually, Gina Shockey’s head is composed entirely of ugly grapefruit — easily identified by the unpleasant smell, the gray-splotched exterior, and most of all, the sour taste.
These are pretty grapefruit. Just look at them — fresh, succulent, nubile spheres of tart flesh, ever tempting to be ravaged forcibly into my oral fixture. With every mastication, the honey-textured juice seeps it’s way slowly but surely to leave a fantastic mess on my face as I lick and gobble to my way to an orgasm of flavor.
PS- I am sorry. I really, really could use an Asian, oh, 18-20 years of age, female, preferably stupid with low self-esteem. Man I suck.