Archive for December, 2004

filipino mail order brides

Friday, December 31st, 2004

As I was browsing online Filipino mail order bride sites, I noticed a number of names I found to be funny. I will list them for you below:

  • Cherry (Multiple times, also spelled Cherrie, Charry, Cherri and also Cherrilyn and Cherryvic)
  • Jellybeth
  • Weiwei
  • Marny
  • Concepcion
  • Porntrp (missing a vowel?)
  • Pinky
  • Girlie
  • Mary Atonette
  • Arlyn Tampon
  • Snooky
  • Vagine
  • Beaverlyn
  • Maracatcat
  • Jachili
  • Dimples
  • Y
  • Jelly
  • Fruitlyn
  • Seksie
  • John
  • Mitch
  • Clearwat
  • Poo
  • Wang
  • Phenphan
  • Nipaporn
  • Colorhot
  • Noname
  • Buttsabar
  • Jeremy
  • Mx
  • Wangbin
  • Messiah
  • Supaporn
  • Pingpong

coheed and cambria make me happy

Monday, December 27th, 2004

So today we got family pictures taken for the church’s new directory. The photographer was awful. He asked me if I was as “arnry” as I look. Anywho, he was making us do these awful poses and the like and no one could get them right, which me and most of us found to be extremely funny. Me, too much, as I got the giggles and ended up laughing so hard I was crying with tears falling all over the place. At one point, because of me, my mom almost lost it laughing and we had to pause again. It took a horribly long time….about 20 minutes for 8 pictures. The last one was the best; I was making an awful face in trying not to laugh, and my sister katie looked drunk and crosseyed. We laughed and laughed and laughed and I began crying again. I wish we would’ve gotten that one, it was great. But we did not. Maybe when we get them back, if my parents give me one I’ll scan it and show you how it resulted. Also, I will scan pictures of my three cousins that they got made for christmas because I feel like it.

Also, I got 16 lipglosses for christmas, in total. If you did not know, I have a problem.

i’d shake claudio sanchez’s hand.

Tomorrow is the long drive to Western Tennessee to see my Grandmother and Granddaddy, Aunt Sarah and Uncle Dan, and their chinese children, Michael, Timothy, and Elissa. Maybe there will be pictures. Then, finally on thursday I am going back east (5 hour trip) to HIGH SPEED INTERNET SERVICE. I have been dying with this dialup crap. And not just reguar dialup, but dialup that doesnt even hardly work and is super slow and disconnects all the time because we live out in the middle of nowhere. The phone line doesnt always even have a dialtone. This morning when I got up (3pm) it didnt have a dialtone; but it did have tremendous static and a woman’s voice saying “please dial your call again”, and also a busy tone, all a the same time. It makes me crazy, I say. I HATE being home. Also I have a bit of a cold and cant stop sneezing. I sneezed on my brother’s feet the other day and he got mad. One time I was eating gummy bears in the car and I got the urge to sneeze and I did and the red gummy bear in my mouth flew out between my hands and stuck to the inside of the windshield and my mom was mad.

merry christmas, kids

Saturday, December 25th, 2004

hope you had a good one.

mine was crap.

and my dad didnt get me a present, send me a card, or even call me to wish me a merry christmas, but i guess i’m used to it and it shouldnt matter since its been the same for my birthday the last 5 years.

be thankful for what you have.

look what my mom did

Friday, December 24th, 2004

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its a birthday cake for jesus

also:

my brother told me not to tap on the glass of his fish tank because the fish would go deaf.

i took this picture for sam

i hate ohio

Friday, December 24th, 2004

When I was at the dentist’s office, I overhead several conversations between my dentist and other people in the office.

Conversation #1

Dr. Martin: (looking at the man in the chair across from mine about to get his teeth cleaned) Hey George, got all your christmas shopping done?

George: Yes, all done.

Dr.: Great, what did you get for Ann (his wife)?

George: We bought each other limited edition NASCAR jackets.

Conversation #2

Dr.: (to the dental assistant helping with my teeth) Do you have all your christmas shopping done?

Asst.: Yeah, pretty much.

Dr.: What did you get for Ryan (her husband)?

Asst.: [bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh, bleh bleh bleh] and a Toby Keith tape.

I didnt realize that people still listened to cassette tapes.

gmail

Wednesday, December 22nd, 2004

if anyone would like to use gmail, i have 10 invites.

if you dont know what gmail is, you are stupid and should look it up and realize its better than whatever you use.

look what i did to steven’s head

Wednesday, December 22nd, 2004

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on your shirt

Wednesday, December 22nd, 2004

the news forecast is 2-10 inches of snow tonight. doesnt that seem like a funny set of numbers? or is it just me?

youre a liar

Tuesday, December 21st, 2004

I like andre 3000. I would shake his hand.

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Do I live in Alaska or Ohio? I cannot remember.

Monday, December 20th, 2004

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it is too freaking cold

Dont watch it plz

Wednesday, December 15th, 2004

Dont ever watch Harold and Kumar go to White Castle unless a) you are a stoner and like stupid stoner films that you can relate to, b) Are stupid and like stupid films because you dont know any better and are extremely amused by stupid plots and poorly made movies, c) like stupid films for no apparent reason.

Its awful. Its so poorly made, I cant even begin to describe it.

The only ok part was when they were hiding in the bathroom stall and the two “hot” english chicks had diarrhea and were playing battleshi*. Also when they stole the Xtreme guys truck and they listened to the Xtreme mix tapes and it had girly music on it.

This was an actual question on my test today

Tuesday, December 14th, 2004

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oh and btw the answer is C.

also:

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fun at bi-lo which is a stupid name for a store

Monday, December 13th, 2004

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GO ROUND AND ROUND WIND UP BE CAPUBLE OF CONCATENATION 360 TURN A SOMERSAULT.

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Articles Household! Complete with a crooked razor! Also, not pictured is a small plastic bottle labeled “Shampoo Cleanlily” and a spray bottle labeled “Detergent”.

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A nice fluffy charming of beautiful bag. But wait, we need to read the print on the back!

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Not suitable for children unfer 36 months as this product contains samll piceces which present a chiking hzard.

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Its not Hotwheels, its DIE-CASTWHEELS! And lo and behold it has real wheels.

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I did not realize that little paper umbrellas could be made ergonomically.

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This is seriously too much…Sorry for the crappiness and that “crispy fried chicken” is cut off. But the black queen of soul food isnt!!!

this is what i would look like as a south park character

Monday, December 13th, 2004

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on second thought maybe thats too brown

additional pictures taken during thanksgiving break (with my cell phone) courtesy of my new bluetooth adapter

Monday, December 13th, 2004

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this is cincinnati

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wtf?

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this is a retard at kroger who wouldnt sit still

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these dont look like children’s balloons. also from kroger

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you probably cant see the text but it says “cockfighting is a sport, not a crime”. i thought this was odd.

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look at this chick in kroger she’ s real fat

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i came from this thing’s uterus

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I know you cant read this but the bumper says in red spraypaint
“REDNECK” and the car is covered in racing stickers sorry for the poor
quality but i had to include it

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lok its a closeup of my cousin penelope how cute

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this isnt from thanksgiving break but me and steven saw it in a store and it was sooo funny.

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gosh steven is hot

TEH END


i is a dork

Monday, December 13th, 2004

yeah so i have been playing world of warcraft with steven’s username. so yesterday i bought my own copy, wearing a star wars tshirt.

im a little upset that i found out my friend andrew is going to iraq like in a week or something. I hope he stays safe.

steven bought me a wireless mouse. it is neat. it is more comfortable for using than my old plain optical mouse. I also bought a bluetooth adapter for my computer. it is neat too.

since i have my own username now on wow i have a new character who is much hotter than that orc i was before. I may not have a pet, but now i am a rogue and they can turn INVISIBLE and pick people’s pockets. I am an undead instead of an orc. steven is also an undead and his name is Jorge (el mejicano muerte) because he thinks its funny, so we came up with the idea that since i wanted to be an undead too this time (so i dont have to do all the same quests over again…boring) that my name would be Jorgina. And so it was.

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lookit my boobies.

omg

Sunday, December 12th, 2004

http://www.lgcma.com/lgcma-jeffstryker.htm

note the last song in the bottom right corner plz

I DID SEE A GOST

Friday, December 10th, 2004

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the grossest thing evar

Friday, December 10th, 2004

When we were learning about childbirth in Anatomy and Physiology II class, Professor Aagaard told us that sometimes when babies are born, nurses use that cheesy waxy crap on their bodies (its really called vernix caseosum, or just vernix) and they use it as hand lotion. If that isnt gross I dont know what is. I bet they dont do it anymore with the rise in stds. *shudders* its so sick. I can understand why it’d be a great moisterizer, since thats why babies are all nice and soft and not wrinkly from being in a water sac for 9 months, but come on, people.

Here is what vernix looks like for you children, its the nasty cheesy whitish crap, i.e. that huge clump in its armpit and in all its fat folds.

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WoW

Thursday, December 9th, 2004

I think I am going to take all kinds of WoW pictures and put them in an album.

THIS IS MY CHARACTER, YLIME, WITHOUT ANY CLOTHES OR ARMOR ON AND CUPPY, MY RAPTOR ONION

I am an Orc. I am also a hunter. I look like the hulk with a tri-mohawk and a pierced nose.
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Apparently I am Hitler

Thursday, December 9th, 2004

thanks jacob

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Whiplash the Rodeo monkey

Thursday, December 9th, 2004

is so freaking cute

I NEED A MONKEY IN A HAT AND POSSIBLY A VEST PLEASE DONATE

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WoW

Thursday, December 9th, 2004

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isnt this succubus hot? i want it for a pet but my class cant have them:( my pet, a raptor, is behind her though, if you can see him. His name is Cuppy. Cuppy the Raptor.

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look at these buttocks. His under pants are not sufficient.

This is what I’d look like if I were an old man

Wednesday, December 8th, 2004

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Song o’ the Day

Tuesday, December 7th, 2004

Why Does The Sun Shine
By: They Might Be Giants

The sun is a mass of incandescent gas
A gigantic nuclear furnace
Where hydrogen is built into helium
At a temperature of millions of degrees

Yo ho, it’s hot, the sun is not
A place where we could live
But here on Earth there’d be no life
Without the light it gives

We need its light
We need its heat
We need its energy
Without the sun, without a doubt
There’d be no you and me

The sun is a mass of incandescent gas
A gigantic nuclear furnace
Where hydrogen is built into helium
At a temperature of millions of degrees

The sun is hot

It is so hot that everything on it is a gas: iron, copper, aluminum, and many others.

The sun is large

If the sun were hollow, a million Earths could fit inside. And yet, the sun is only a middle-sized star.
The sun is far away

About 93 million miles away, and that’s why it looks so small.

And even when it’s out of sight
The sun shines night and day

The sun gives heat
The sun gives light
The sunlight that we see
The sunlight comes from our own sun’s
Atomic energy

Scientists
have found that the sun is a huge atom-smashing machine. The heat and
light of the sun come from the nuclear reactions of hydrogen, carbon,
nitrogen, and helium.
The sun is a mass of incandescent gas
A gigantic nuclear furnace
Where hydrogen is built into helium
At a temperature of millions of degrees

Im pretty smart

Monday, December 6th, 2004

I peed and when I started to flush the toilet, I noticed it was a very bright, abnormal, neon, radioactive looking pee. My brain immediately went into nurse mode and thought about why it would be like this. Then suddenly I remembered in nutrition class learning about now Vitamin B makes your pee bright yellow. Then I wondered if the juice I just bought had vitamin B in it. Sho nuff, when I looked at the bottle, I realized it was called “Blueberry B Monster Vitamin B Smoothie”.

Realizing vitamin b was the culprit ahead of time, I now pronounce myself a genius for the nth time.

This is cute and true.

Monday, December 6th, 2004

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VANILLAsweetniz NSFW

Sunday, December 5th, 2004

VANILLAsweetniz’s BlackPlanet.com Personal Page

HEY MY PEOPLE….SYMONE!! YES THAT`S ME ABOVE ABOVE!!! Beautiful huh? I`M IN THA ATL SHAWTY!!

i am a dork and i enjoy world of warcraft for many hours it takes up a lot of time.

Wednesday, December 1st, 2004

I DONT USE BLOGGER ANYMORE I USE WORDPRESS I HEAR ITS COOLER

I CAN DANCE

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