this and that

http://chattanooga.craigslist.org/wan/740618533.html

I stumbled upon the website for the sheriff of the town I grew up in. It is awful. Im pretty sure it was designed by a 13 year old girl. It seriously almost looks like a joke.
The website contains this picture, which I think is funny:

This is a post in response to people who are surprised to learn I am an RN, and those who want to know if I like nursing.

Every time I meet someone, they ask, “So, how do you like nursing??” after they ask me what I do for a living. It is a complicated answer. Usually I just mumble something about how its okay, the pay is pretty good, and move on. However, for people who really want to know, here are some actual thoughts I have on nursing.

PROS:

• It pays pretty well. Also, because we are so understaffed, we can work unlimited overtime when needed, and not only do we get paid time and a half, but also we get a $75 shift bonus for each extra shift we work.
• I only have to work three days a week. [See both section, though]
• I know I’ll always be able to find a job. Nursing is in super high demand.
• It is interesting and amusing at times. [See both section]
• I dont mind wearing scrubs. Its better than having to wear dress clothes, or some other type of ugly uniform.
• It is good exercise. [See both section]
• Even if I have a really bad night, I know at least Ive made other people feel a little better.

CONS:

• It is exhausting. I spend the majority of my 12 hour shift walking, lifting patients, helping to lift very obese patients, etc. Also, there is the occasional running of a patient to the ICU (you know, the dramatic running with the bed down the hall, etc), running to a patient’s room when their heart has a bad rhythm (or no rhythm, lol), holding down crazy patients, cleaning up poop, etc)
• 12 hour shifts are really long. It is sometimes hard to stay awake and keep going at about 3am.
• I get beat up all the freaking time. Confused/Alcohol detox pt’s are often violent and mean. Ive been kicked, hit, punched, pinched, etc. Ive even had a bruise on my boob before. Ive had my hair pulled. Ive had a pt grab my stethoscope from around my neck and try to pull me into their bed. Ive had my butt grabbed more times than I can count. I wont even go into being screamed and yelled at.
• Nursing is really, really frustrating about 90% of the time. Im going to have to make a separate paragraph about that.
• The potential to pick up yucky germs sucks. We constantly have at least two or three patients on isolation. Some you just have to wear gloves when wearing the room, some gowns and masks. It is kinda scary to have to potential to catch TB or MRSA, etc while doing your job. Part of the problem is that patients will come to our floor, and wont get diagnosed with their bug until after they’ve been there a week. We had a patient with TB on our floor for like a week and a half before he was diagnosed with TB, so all the nurses didnt know to wear TB masks and were exposed.
• We are understaffed. Sometimes we end up having to do our job and the nursing assistants job too. Our patients are also getting sicker and sicker, which means we need to have a lower ratio of patients to nurses, but it isnt happening. More patients are falling, more errors are being made, etc.

BOTH:

• I only have to work 3 days a week. However, the day after I work, I dont end up being able to do anything because I have to sleep, and Im aching all over.
• It is interesting and funny sometimes. We get patients with exotic diseases and conditions, which are interesting, but not fun to catch. Confused patients make me laugh internally nearly every single shift. However, sometimes even though something is funny, it requires followup. Sometimes its restraints, sometimes its pulling dentures out of the toilet and trying to figure out how to clean them, and sometimes you have to clean poop out of the blinds.
• It is good exercise. At the same time though, its so seriously exhausting. Ive had patients that are so fat, it took 8 of us to move them up in bed. It is estimated nurses walk at least 4-8 or more miles per shift. Look it up if you dont believe me. I mean, I know its good for me, but doing it 3 times a week sucks.

As mentioned earlier, nursing is just really frustrating. That is the worst part. That post will be later.

died yesterday.

The new Weezer video for Pork and Beans is neat.

http://2bnb4.com/kvz/dirrer/cosmetic-enhancement.htm

44

If I like Juliette Lewis.

or not.

I just dont know.

I do like her a lot in Natural Born Killers though!

She’s kinda weird.

I mean, what is this?

She is in a band, also, Juliette and the Licks.

I dont like her rockstar crotch thrust photos. You can look them up if you want.

Also, its like, sometimes she is smokin hot:

And then there are like days where she barely looks like the same person. She varies too widely!

and then there is this

what do you think y/n?

Pepe was tired.

Pepe’s neck isnt broken, I promise. He sleeps this way sometimes.

stacking stuff on my father in laws cat.

This is us in the car. Note that he is sitting on my left leg. Its the only place he’ll ride in the car if I am driving. He doesnt move though, so its safe, dont worry. Ive driven 10 hours to Ohio like this.

I bought Toto and Pepe matching patriotic polo shirts. They have an american flag on the lapel. Pepe’s is blue, Toto’s is red. You’ll see his below!

Toto on Memorial day in his patriotic polo! With a hair bow! He’s a boy!

He’s my mr. fluffykins.

This is Toto the day I got him, about a month ago!

hope you enjoyed my puppers!

they are my fur babies!

jumping frenchmen of maine

sfw

Im not making fun of them, I swear. I just think its….interesting. Involves a dead baby.

Read the rest of this entry »

A kid at Petco yesterday convinced me to eat a dog biscuit.

Me: [after viewing patient kicking his legs around violently]   Do you need something Mr. So and So?
Confused Patient: Yeah. [pause]

Me: What do you need?

Confused Patient: Somebody like you.

Confused Patient: I’ll make you a deal.

Me: Ok, what?

Confused Patient: If you take me out of these restraints, I’ll cook ye up some pork n beans, taters, and onions. I got a whole case-a-whiskey out back too. We’ll have a party and I’ll touch yer boobies [grabs my boob]. Wooo!
Coworker: Do you like Chinese and Japanese food both? I love them!
Me: Yeah, I love all Asian food in general.

Coworker: Oh really? Ive never tried Asian before.

Confused patient (not mine): [after falling on the floor] WHAT HAPPENED??

Nurse: You fell down onto the floor, sir.

Confused patient (not mine): Ohhhh. I thought I was in Ireland.

But yesterday Pepe got stung by a bee right by his eye.

It was red and swollen and watery and I was scared.

and his album comes out on my birthday

bret michaels is such a jerk

BRET MICHAELS NEW MUSIC VIDEO

SERIOUSLY

GETS AN F-

how cute! it looks like he is waving!

So like I said in my last post, I broke my computer.

FYI-this is like the fourth computer I broke.

Whatever.

Adam said if he couldnt fix it, I could buy a new one today. He couldnt fix it.

So I have a new computer.

It has one of them newfangled built in webcams.

That would have been helpful like, 8 years ago when I was in highschool, but I dont really use them now. I took a picture in this dimly lit room anyways to try it out.

It isnt very flattering but you can have it if you want.

my titties are everywhere

also it looks like my shoulders are really wide like a linebacker

lol i just realized another reason the picture is bad quality is because I left the protective plastic thing over the lens

lulz

So im not here for a bit.
It says a boot file is missing or something.

I will be able to check my email though with adam’s sidekick til its fixed (that is how I am posting this).

Ps
Toto is doing great. It took a few hours for him and pepe to get along, but now they are fine. Toto is like the sweetest dog ever, and very quiet. I got him and pepe matching polo shirts; toto has a red shirt, and pepe has a blue one. They have little american flags on the lapel. Toto also lets me put a bow in his hair. It is adorable.

I took them to the vet last friday for their yearly shots, heart worm and intestinal worm tests, and physical. They were both ok. Toto has a little hernia on his belly that I noticed the day I got him. The vet said it looked ok and that he didn’t need surgery.

I got them both microchipped while we were there. They hated it, but now if they get lost, I have a better chance of getting them back.

Toto lays around all day. He loves tummy rubrubs. He is so fluffy. I bathe him and pepe in coconut pineapple shampoo and conditioner and they wear matching body spray.

Last night one of my patients kicked me repeatedly and then punched me in the stomach.

Also, she threatened to kill me. She said she was going to come to my house and tie me to the bed and set my house on fire and roast me like a pig.

She said if she had a stick she’d beat me to a bloody pulp (minus a lot of curse words).

Also, she is going to call the police on me and get me put in jail and sue me and Im not going to forget putting her in restraints until the day I die or longer.

I am so scared of 96 pound 95 year old women burning my house down in the night, but I deserve it, because she said I am literally an evil shedevil and I keep my tail tucked down the leg of my pants.

PS:

This is a secret, but I really wanted to say to her “alright then, come and get me!”

lol I did say “you dont know where I live” when she said she was going to burn my house down. Also, I told her that I didnt care if she got me put in jail because I could use some sleep and they have those beds in there.

people with dementia are both frustrating AND funny.