I was born at a very early age. June 3, to be exact, in the year 1985. I was born in at Beaver Medical Center (it is near Pittsburg) at 6:55 am. My mother was working there as a nurse at the time in the Labor and Delivery department, so when I was born, all she had to do was lay down. I weighed 7 pounds and 7 ounces, and I don't care enough to ask my mom how long I was. My head was misshapen and my grandma cried because she didn't want a granddaughter with a cone shaped head. Of course this happens to babies all the time, and it fixes itself within a short time, but she didn't know this.

    My mom says I was a good baby. I ate her diamond earrings when I was pretty little, but she just waited for them to come out naturally. I won a Harrisburg baby pageant at age one for the most beautiful baby in all of Pennsylvania, and had to be in all kinds of parades and such, and in the newspaper. Don't get any ideas about me being beautiful or anything though, because look at Bill Clinton. He also won a baby pageant when he was little. My future is dim.

    I learned how to walk and crap at some age. I taught myself how to tie my shoes at age 3. I was obsessed with Sesame Street; I even went and saw Sesame Street live. I watched it religiously. I knew how to read and write before kindergarten. I went to a private christian school, Pike Christian Academy. I was extremely shy, and in kindergarten I wouldn't talk to anyone, I even stood beside the teacher all of recess. I loved my kindergarten teacher very much. Her name was Mrs. Ackerman, but then she got married to someone at the very end of the year. She chose me to be her flower girl, but I didn't want to do it because I was so shy. Towards the middle of the year, I did become friends with one girl, and her name was Jennifer. I wanted to play this game called the bread and butter game one day, but you have to have two people. It was a matching game where on the bread, there was a capital letter, and on the butter slices there was a lower case letter, and you had to match them up, and she said she would play with me. Mrs. Ackerman begged me to be her flower girl, and when I refused, she asked if I would do it if Jennifer did it with me too, and I agreed. It was fun I suppose, but I hit a bald man in the head with one of those bird seed things, and I cried. I remember a lot from my kindergarten year. Once we were fingerpainting and I didn't want to get my hands dirty and I asked my teacher if she'd do it for me and she said no, that I needed to and I cried. Each year the kindergarten class does a big play thing, and parts are distributed to each child by the teacher, no trying out or anything, and she picked me as the lead female part, Little Bo Peep. The whole story was about how she lost her sheep, and various Mother Goose characters help her find them. I didn't to be the main part, nor be up front of lots of people, so I cried my head off. I used to get frustrated with the other children who could not read or write. They moved much too slowly for me. I used to get the most upset when we went over these charts. Oh, they still make me upset when I think about them. She'd put up a chart that had in a line "ga ge gi go gu" on the rungs of a ladder, and then some animal with a corresponding letter (i.e. for the g one it was this goat in overalls) would be climbing the ladder on the side. I HATED that part. Then there was this contest. We had to memorize verses of the Bible that had a first letter of every letter in the alphabet. Don't ask me how exactly that worked, I don't remember, but like the first verse for A was "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.- Romans 8:28. For each verse we recited, we got a card with the letter on it and the verse. Whoever got all 26 cards first won something, but I cant remember what. I ended up winning. We had reading groups that year. They were names of birds, I was in the Cardinal group, and I was happy, because that's my Grandpa's favorite bird. There were two kindergarten classes. Mrs. Ackerman taught one, and the other teacher, who I was sure was evil, was named Mrs. Crocker. One day Mrs. Ackerman was sick, so we all had to be in one big class taught by Mrs. Ackerman. For some reason, a mouse had gotten into the room and we were all scared to death and we tried to not put our feet on the floor as so the mouse would not touch us, because it kept running around. Mrs. Crocker kept trying to hit it with her yardstick, which I didn't understand, because if for some reason she did get it, wouldnt that be pretty traumatizing for us kids?

    In first grade, I got my first crush on a blonde boy named Kevin. He sat beside me because his last name was Downey and mine is Eddy. I was so excited. We had these little "Kindness Score Cards" and whenever we got caught doing something good, we got a stamp on them, and whenever we got all 10 places stamped, we got to pick something out of the prize box. One day Kevin asked me if he could borrow my pencil sharpener and I said yes, and I got a stamp. Then he accidentally spilled all of the shavings all over my desk, I said it was okay and I'd help him clean it up, and I got ANOTHER stamp. I was so the model student. That year was the first year you have to do a science fair project, but the whole class does one together. We did it on dinosaurs, and made a large paper mache brontosaurus. Looking back now on pictures of it, it really looks more like a hippo crossed with a giraffe. It was nauseating sea foam green in color. It doesn't get much more gross than that. I was in Brownies (girl scouts) that year, because one of my classmate's mothers was the troop leader, and I like cookies. I don't remember much about it, other than that it was retarded. We started attending church sometimes during this point. My mom started working for Dr. Roddy that year, and he was SDA, and he got us into it. My younger sister Katie was born that year. I used to have loads of fun playing with her fat self. She was huge. I was still in dance class at this point. I was in tap, jazz, and ballet for 3 years. I don't think I liked it all that much, seeing as how I dropped out. One recital we did "Its a Small World" in ballet class. We were paired off and each pair was a different nationality. I was a little Scottish girl, with my partner Erica, who didn't show up at the recital. Man, I felt dumb. I had to wear a stupid outfit that was a little plaid skirt and leotard, and a stupid beret with a big red pom pom on the top. It was ugly to say the least. My mom has pictures, its funnier than anything, ask her to see them sometime. We started going to Chillicothe Seventh Day Adventist church steadily sometime around this point, and I think my mom got baptized into it that year.

    Second grade I switched to a little school my church had created. It was called Valley View. It didn't have many kids in it, only like 17 or something. There were only two kids in my second grade class, me and a boy named Caleb, who I soon developed a crush on. But so did Rachel (not my sister at the time, but best friend)! We fought over him for years. I got kicked out of girl scouts sometime at the beginning of this year for missing too many meetings. That year on christmas break, my family and the Roddy family went on vacation together to Disney World. We stayed in a rental house thing in Kissimee. It was lots of fun. This boy at school named Adam Frump used to make fun of me a lot. He was very mean, but I cant really remember anything he said. For spelling/reading class, they didn't just put you in a class for second graders. We had to take a test to see what level we tested out to be in. I would have been in the 8th grade level, but I missed the word nondenominational somehow, so I was in the 7th grade level instead. Pretty good for a 7 year old to be in a spelling/reading class with 7th graders. At least I thought so. One of the teachers at that school creeped me out. Her name was Ms. Chester. She had all this facial hair, and I remember a first grader asking her if she was a boy. She used to grade papers and pick her nose with her pinkie. It was so nasty. There was a lady who used to come every once in a while and read us stories. She was really lame and her name was Kay. Kay is a retarded name. If your name is Kay, you should change it or commit suicide immediately*. That year a 4th grader named Amy ran away. Or more correctly put, tried to run away by running into the woods behind the school because her mother was going to take her puppies away. It was only cool cuz we got out of school the rest of the day. She had problems or something and used to steal stuff from all of us. She stole my juice box and fruit pie thing once. She stole Rachel's stuff once too, and all kinds of stuff from other people. She used to fart ALL the time. It was disgusting. Speaking of disgusting, there was a lady who went to my church who was really really big who smelled really bad. She was like a human extra large garbage bag full of lard with a head on it. she weighed so much! I felt so bad for her. She peed on the stairs once because she couldn't hold it any longer and it was taking her too long to get down them. We went to school with a boy named Charlie. He used to sit around and suck the ink out of markers and eat crayons. He'd have marker ink streaming down his face every day. He tried to pull my pants down once while playing tag and I told on him and he got suspended. He was gross please.

    Third grade I went back to PCA (Pike Christian Academy). All my friends were glad to see me. I was behind though because in second grade there they learn cursive and I didn't learn it at Valley View. I caught on quickly though.

more soon please....

*Disclaimer: Not responsible for any accidents or fatalities, but you certainly deserve them if you're dumb enough to do anything I tell you to do.